Today I guess you could say I earned another "right of passage." I got de-ported. Definitely not as bad as I anticipated. Could have done without the sound effects and slight pain of the Lidocaine, but otherwise it went smoothly. Now it itches!!

Oh yesterday, around 1 o'clock I called Dr. Gallaher's office because my chest has been feeling bruised and my back hurting. Scared I am catching Zackary's cold I figured better safe than sorry. If this had been Dr. Dove's office I'd still be waiting for a call back. Anyway, they called me right back and I saw him yesterday afternoon. He didn't feel it was anything to worry about since I have no cough and no fevers. He thinks it's more inflammation of the area between the ribs.

I am still on the hunt for a job! Work from home preferred, but anything will really work. Dr. Gallaher may have a "lead" for me :) I certainly hope that works out.

Not too much to report for the week.

We did find out that Godsmack is coming to Raleigh this summer so everyone in my family is really excited. I've tried to see that band for many, many years and every time they come through I've been sick. Not this year, I've got my scooter, I am going! Also Nickelback and Def Leppard are coming. Great year for concerts!

Yesterday I went to the surgeon to consult about getting my port removed. It's scheduled for next Thursday. A little scary. It's been with me for 8 years. Now though it's a nuisance having to flush it every 8 weeks. The only issue is if I have to go in the hospital they may have to put in a PICC line.

Happy Day!

Here it is Friday already. Gesh, the weeks just fly by.

I am still trying to cope with loosing Brutus. I know it'll take time. I can't seem to pull myself up and out of the "depressed" stage.

On Tuesday I meant to mention my visit with Dr. Gallaher, the pulmonologist in KNC. He's so awesome, I wish he practiced in Goldsboro. But, I am sticking with him. He took more time to listen to me and made sure I was comfortable. All in all, we were in with him for over an hour. He was impressed at how organized my records are :) We really don't have a change in plan other than he's going to be in touch with Dr. Morrison at Duke to inquire about me starting Viagra (yes, you read correctly, Viagra). I have a mild-moderate case of pulmonary hyptertension caused by the fibrosis and Viagra has been shown to reduce this, therefore making breathing a little easier. Could be fun too!

Oh he too reminded me, that I have been his only patient which he has not been able to do a bronchoscopy on because I fought him so hard. He said he gave me enough drugs to down a cow....hehehe!

Yesterday, we met with Dr. Palmer about Brutus. Before we met with him they brought Brutus int the room for us. He was just lying there limp and helpless. It broke my heart, but we all knew what the humane thing to do was. We cuddled with him for about 30 minutes. I am not sure if he knew we were there. Dr. Palmer came in and told us he felt like it was a stroke and possibly some mini strokes and that he hasn't shown any improvement at all. Mom and I said our goodbyes and Bob stayed with him.

He lived a good life. We got him when he was about 2 years old from our niece in Florida. Bob made a special trip down there to bring him home. He slept comfortably all the way and shared a McDonald's hamburger with Bob. I remember very vividly locking him and the cat in our hallway just so they'd become friends. It worked. And one of Brutus' first nights home, he pee'd on me in bed.

Brutus had a mean streak to him, especially if he did something wrong, like pee in the house. Try scolding him, he'd get pissed and attack. Or if you tried moving his blankie.

But Brutus was one of my companions during my time in NY. He and Nina kept me sane. They loved and cuddled with me and showed me unconditional love. On my worst days those dogs were right there to comfort me. He always gave me the warm fuzzies!

I Miss Him So Much!

Brute-TooT!

Brutus, my Chihuahua of 13 years is very sick. It started last week we noticed he was peeing blood. (And we only noticed because we have 3 very bad dogs who think our tile floor is the grass) Anyway, Dr. Palmer (yes our vet is a Palmer too) thought it was a bladder infection and gave him some antibiotics. That was last Friday. Last night, about 3 o'clock Bob heard Brute yelp so he went downstairs and sat with him. Brutus was almost paralyzed-like, flimsy. He had pee'd blood more in the bathroom and vomited his dinner. So this morning Bob took him in and they are very good about leaving your animal there so they can monitor them. I just called at 4:00 and Dr. Palmer thinks Brutus had a stroke, vertigo or some other long word idiopathic ______ something. Anyway, he wants to keep Brutus there for the weekend to monitor him and give him steroids. He said most dogs will recover to what their new "normal" is going to be in about 3-weeks. Long term, his outlook is probably not good. And that makes me sad!

My Baby Is Growing...

Well, daycare told Bob today it was ok for Zacky to wear big-boy underwear to school. He's been really good about telling us when he has to go pee-pee and stinky. Most of the time he has a dry pull up and in the morning rarely does he have a we diaper.

Our next BIG thing is transition him from his crib to the toddler bed. Ahhh, that's gonna be fun.

All The More Complicated!

Just when we think we're on the right track, getting ready to do something good...whack! The work Bob had lined up, which included a pole barn, partial remodel and a custom house in Cutter Creek have all been delayed. I am thankful he has work to look forward to, I just wish it were ready now.

My heart and my brain keep telling me I want that piece of land. It's almost an acre, nice large corner lot. I hope in the very near future we'll be able to pull it off. The seller hasn't marketed this property yet and is giving an incentive to the first buyers. Land is over priced anyway, but I am fairly confident he'd come way off his price to get a sold sign in there.

I MUST be patient.

On to other things. Mom got her hair cut yesterday. First real haircut since we buzzed it in the summer of 2007. It's super short now and not so frizzy. I think it'll be easier for her to maintain.

I have my appointment coming up with Dr. Gallaher. While I am not sure he'll make me do another pulmonary test, I am a bit nervous. Yes, me, nervous. Those tests are very hard on the lungs, and for someone with severe breathing issues I have a huge fear of not being able to breathe. And they don't let you use oxygen!!! The other appointment I have coming is with the surgeon. I can't remember if I mentioned this but after almost 8-years, I am going to try and get my port taken out. Being so thin it's not too pretty when I try to wear a bathing suit or tank top. And summer is coming! I want to float in the pool and look somewhat pretty :)